February 11th, 2009,
That insolent man! Oh, I'm sorry diary, I have not spoken to you in quite a while.
I don't want to talk about the school orchestra trip. I will remember it, and if I forget so be it.
I don't want to talk about the lie I've told. It'll foil itself soon enough.
But my Capriol! My God, does that man not know how much he hurts me!
Every day it is like he is killing me over and over and over! His name I see everywhere, my God!
I wish he would just go so that I never have to see him again.
Can I please just have what I would die for?
I'm in love with the fool! Nobody understands that! Love! Love!
His face, his smile, his hands, his hair, him! Everything, absolutely everything!
And I hate myself and I hate him. I don't want to love like this.
The only ones I have not lied to: Chopin, Liszt, Berlioz, music! Music!